Consent in Stories (18+)

[Kishi]

I like when it oscillates.
'I consented to this as a bet, but it went too far'- or 'it ain't bondage till you want out' takes you from willing to unwilling.

Stockholm syndrom, of various levels, takes you from unwilling to willing.

Both are really, really fascinating templates for looking at the psychology of bondage.

I really love these sort of in-between dynamics, where the progression of a scene really fucks with a sub's head. I'm heavily into CNC (as a sub) irl, but fiction lets you stretch the limits of morality even further.

Especially big fan of being taken from unwilling to willing. Perhaps it started as a totally nonconsensual kidnapping, but a sub ends up shamefully enjoying it.

[YourCaptor75]

You're a man of culture haha

[Kishi]

You're a person of culture haha

Unfortunately I haven't yet had the chance to organize a serious kidnapping roleplay/scene. Would love to play out the stockholm dynamic. I've gotten close-ish, with a dom stuffing me in a duffel bag and driving me back to his place, but there wasn't any serious roleplaying element to it. We were just having fun, really.

I have been able to touch on that "went too far" angle through CNC, though. Preemptively agreed upon a set of limits for going slightly beyond what I could physically handle. Can attest it's tons of fun to a masochist like me ;P

[Detective-Gag]

I think it’s something very much in between.

I know that for myself…and probably for a lot of people…this thing usually starts by seeing people tied up in fictional media: the person gets tied & gagged, usually an unwilling hostage, and we see them struggle & react to the drama of the scene…and on some level, we want to emulate that sense of suspense or drama.

That’s what gets referred to often as “the fantasy”: we know it’s fake, we know it’s only part of the story…but in that narrative, we love that drama; because it has stakes. The victim has appeal with the nature of their plight, and we delight in seeing how they react. It’s a world of kidnapping victims, and villains, where getting tied up by such individuals is a form of escapism, ironically.

Consensual stories become endearing because we reach that point when we acknowledge “the fantasy” for what it is…a fantasy…and the characters in the stories (and ourselves), acknowledge that we can sort of recreate it for fun; under a set of mutual rules & understandings so that nothing goes to the extreme, nobody is hurt or nervous or upset, and we can enjoy the fantasy without the conflict or drama usually associated with it.

Dramatic kidnappings or hostage scenarios…or playful, agreed-upon tie-up games…

…I like ‘em both. : )

[Rtj65]

My preferences generally fall somewhere in between. Of course, in the real world, consent is of the utmost importance; it should take precedence over anything else when it comes to engaging in anything kink-related.

Stories and/or fantasies can be a perfectly good safe space to explore less consensual scenarios or ideas, however, and let you explore different sets of relationship dynamics, emotions etc., that you wouldn't be able to get through a purely consensual situation. Plus, it's a lot easier to lose yourself in the excitement and adrenaline that comes with a non-consensual scene, like a kidnapping, in the knowledge that it's purely fictional. I can still really enjoy a purely consensual story as well, if it's compellingly written.